Do What You Love & Love What You Do!
By: Caroline Zappas
Listing your extracurriculars is a key component to filling out most job, college, and scholarship applications, and can sometimes provoke feelings of anxiety for most young adults. This often stems from quantitatively comparing extracurricular involvement with peers, as if the number of clubs one joins equates to a higher measure of self-worth. Coming from personal experience, it’s easy to beat yourself up over the idea that what you’re involved in isn’t “enough” or “impressive” to peers, employers, or application reviewers. I’ve also found that groups of high achieving people are especially prone to this feeling – that in order to prove your worth you must have extracurriculars that take up almost all your free time. There is emerging research that finds high school students at “high-achieving schools” - public and private schools with high standardized test scores, varied extracurricular and academic offerings, and graduates that head off to top colleges - are experiencing higher rates of mental and behavioral health problems than the national norms (Wallace, 2019). I believe this stems from the notion you must be heavily involved in multiple activities to be considered accomplished.
I know I go through cycles of feeling extremely incompetent and searching for things to get involved in, which is entirely for the wrong reason. I want to be clear that I don’t mean to imply that there is anything wrong with being heavily involved in things you are passionate about. I do, however, believe there should be a balance between involvement and having personal time, and that choosing to partake in certain activities must be done for the right reasons.
What are the right reasons, you may ask? Well, I am a firm believer that joining a club just for the sake of saying you are “involved,” is not the right reason, and plus, deep down, you will not be fulfilled from wasting your time on something you are not authentically passionate about. Instead, by spending time doing things you are genuinely interested in, you can have better physiological and physical functioning (Pressman et al., 2009). A 2009 study published in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine found that individuals who engage more frequently with enjoyable leisure activities reported experiencing greater life satisfaction, life engagement, and social support, as well as lower rates of depression (Pressman et al., 2009). While it makes a lot of sense that people enjoy getting involved in causes, clubs, and other extracurriculars that make them happiest, I often find myself and my peers becoming involved in activities just for a “resume boost.” These activities, if they do not create value for you, will not only leave you feeling frustrated but fail to provide the same rewards that joining activities you actually enjoy.
Another aspect to consider is the importance of allocating time to yourself. For many young adults, it is easy to begin to feel as though your life is constantly dictated by obligations you never really wanted to sign up for, leaving little time to yourself. Alone time that is spent in a meaningful way is very beneficial to your health. Choosing to spend time alone is thought to “benefit your social relationships, improve your creativity and confidence, and help you regulate your emotions so that you can better deal with adverse situations” (Higgs, 2019). This concept is somewhat difficult to put into practice, especially as many young adults view alone time as being the same as loneliness - even though the two are quite different. However, even for the most social and extroverted of people out there, incorporating small ways into your daily routine to simply enjoy your own company can be incredibly helpful. A few of my favorite ways to spend time by myself include going for a walk without headphones, grabbing lunch, and eating outside on a sunny day, as well as curling up on the couch with a favorite book.
Ultimately, your time is valuable, and how you spend it matters! While this may sound morbid, two of the top five regrets of the dying are “I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me” and “I wish I had let myself be happier” (Warren, 2012). Your time on Earth is limited, so it is important to engage in activities that enrich your life. Spend time discovering what fulfills you, and chase after it!
Reference List
Higgs, M. M. (2019). Why you should find time to be alone with yourself. The New York Times. https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/28/smarter-living/the-benefits-of-being-alone.html
Pressman, S. D., Matthews, K. A., Cohen, S., Martire, L. M., Scheier, M., Baum, A., & Schulz, R. (2009). Association of enjoyable leisure activities with psychological and physical well-being. Psychosomatic medicine, 71(7), 725–732. https://doi.org/10.1097/PSY.0b013e3181ad7978
Wallace, J. (2019). Students in high-achieving schools are now named an ‘at-risk’ group, study says. The Washington Post. https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2019/09/26/students-high-achieving-schools-are-now-named-an-at-risk-group/
Warren, B. (2012). The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing by Bronnie Ware. Proceedings (Baylor University. Medical Center), 25(3), 299–300.